As a United States citizen, you either love President Trump
or you hate him. You are for gun control or not. You think of Muslims as
terrorists or as peace loving individuals. You believe all immigrants are free
loading people taking money from hard working Americans or you believe they are
humans trying to find a better life. The list of thinking one way versus
another is endless. When did the world become so black and white? And more importantly, when did the world
become so intolerant and hateful towards those whose beliefs are different from
our own.
It saddens me to think of how cruel we as a society have
become. This is especially evident in the
American political arena. The
Liberals vs. the Conservatives. There are no longer the common decencies of
eras gone by. Everyone is vicious. My Facebook feed is full of hatred from one
view to the other. The level of disrespect for others astounds me. Whatever
your viewpoint, can’t we voice our opinions without such vile comments?
Gun rights. America was created on the backs of men and
women owning firearms. Many people feed their families by using a gun. But with
the latest school shooting in Parkland FL – the attacks on the children who
were affected by this shooting really makes me sick. Adults should be ashamed
of themselves for the level of harassment, harsh criticism, and outright name
calling for these students who feel we need tougher gun laws. Right or wrong, they
are kids. You are an adult. You are not setting a very good example for today’s
youth! I’m not sure who has showed more maturity in this debate. Good for the
students in exercising their rights to free speech. Isn’t that what makes
America great??
Of course then there is the battle over immigration. No one
seems to remember that they are in the US because their forefathers were
immigrants themselves. Even Native Americans supposedly immigrated from Europe
via the Bering Straits. Can any of us really blame others for wanting a better
life? I sure can’t. Not every Mexican is a rapist (as my state governor stated)
or looking for a free hand out. Not every Muslim is intent on killing
Americans. Not every black person I encounter on a street is going to assault
me.
Recently there was a big discussion about raising the
minimum wage for workers. This debate was also very heated. Why should a person flipping burgers at McDonald's
make the same as a person who went to college and now has student loans to pay as
they begin their careers in white collar jobs? I won’t pretend to know the
correct answer but I do know this. Many people, for mental or physical reasons,
don’t have the ability to be white collar worker – but that doesn’t mean they
shouldn’t be making a livable wage working 40 hours or more a week at a job –
whether it’s working at Walmart, cleaning bedpans in a nursing home or serving
me my food when I go out to dine. But, as to be expected – there was
mudslinging on both sides of this debate. And again, I was amazed at the level
of hostility among peers. I say THANK YOU for those who will dump my elderly
mother’s bedpan, for the Walmart check out person because I dislike the self –checkout
kiosks, and to those who wait on me in the restaurant. I am grateful I don’t
have to do what these people do. I went to college and have had ‘white collar
jobs’ – and I admit – I can’t think of too many blue collar jobs I want or
could do!! THANK GOD there are people who can do those jobs. But that doesn’t
make them less of a human. These people deserve to earn a wage that feeds their
families as well as I do. I am grateful every day that my husband and I are a
two income family. My heart goes out to single parents who might work as a
receptionist during the day and waitress at night just to keep food on the
table. They scrape by on meager earnings yet work harder than any fat cat on
Wall Street.
So how do we get more love, acceptance and happiness into
this hostile, cruel world? I believe it’s possible. I look at other countries
that have low crime, no immigration issues, no racism confrontations etc and I
know it’s possible to have that here in the USA. There have always been and
most likely will always be wars between nations, but when the wars are within
your own borders, there is a big problem!
When my daughters are fighting, I tell them to ignore each
other. You give power to the opponent when you acknowledge their comments by
arguing or showing hurt feelings. I keep telling them to own their own
feelings. I tell them when someone at school is picking on them, that person
can’t make you be unhappy, only you can make yourself unhappy – by taking cruel
comments into your heart and mind, and reacting to them. The more you react,
the more mean, hurtful things people will say to you. Walk away, disengage, and
don’t participate. Don’t give angry, negative people your power!
As I lay in bed tossing and turning last night, thinking
about how cruel our society has become, the above reactions seemed like the
only response I can give to all the negative people out there. The pleasantries
of an earlier generation seem to have disappeared with those who lived it. The
new reality is cruel and unpleasant – downright hostile in many ways. There is no more empathy and tolerance for people.
This saddens me. But I don’t want to be sad. I don’t want to be angry when
someone has a viewpoint other than my own. I have always been open minded. I never saw a
reason to hate someone because they were a different skin color or practiced a
different faith. The thought of that as a legit reason to hate someone astounds
me. Why should we hate anyone? While I
am not fond of child abusers- how can I possibly know the life this person has
had. If you knew that someone was severely abusing a child, you would want to
protect and save that child from the abuser. But what if that child is now a 30
year old man repeating those severe abuses on a child of his own, as was done
to him? Now we hate this person, we don’t want to protect and save this man.
For him, compassion no longer exists. Maybe rightfully so. I’m not here to
debate or judge. I’m just wondering where compassion for others disappeared to.
I have let anger and unhappiness of those around me weigh on
my subconscious (enough to keep me awake at night) – thus I have given my power
to those I don’t agree with. NO MORE. I am taking my power back. I refuse to
get caught up in the battles that surround me – Trump vs. Anti-Trump, Guns vs.
No guns etc.
We live in a culture that discourages empathy.....Barack Obama
I pledge to not engage in any more negative, hurtful and
cruel debates with people who just seem to want to act important and better
than me if I disagree with them. These people, to me, are just looking for a
fight. Some people thrive on being right, being hurtful and living in a half
empty glass world. I release them with love. I will do my best to keep my power
to myself and not give it to those who only want to fight with me. I can
reasonably hear arguments for opposing viewpoints, but I will not get into
heated debates and allow anyone to steal my happiness.
For those who seem intent on spreading hatred, I will think loving,
positive thought for them. Love is more powerful. If I can bring a bit of love
into my neck of the woods, it’s one tiny step towards a more loving world. And
if one other reader will do the same, we will spread twice as much love that
this world so desperately needs.
You can’t have a beautiful, harmonious and happy world by
arguing with those who have different view points. Arguments just bring more
arguments. Being true to yourself, being loving, happy and kind will bring more
of the same into this world. That is the only thing worth fighting for!
